~a column by Colleen O’Brien
Years ago, I invented a salad made of cottage cheese, cucumbers and green olives. My sister named it “cuke-olive salad,” and for years it was my go-to for an afternoon snack.
Growing up, my sisters and I spent late summer afternoons gathering veggies from the garden for supper. At Mom’s direction, we’d harvest: 3 tomatoes, several green onions, a couple of cukes, radishes, carrots, corn, lettuce, Swiss chard, potatoes, depending on the month. It was not hard work, and we looked forward to the favorite side dish of those hot summer nights, Mom’s sliced cucumbers, onions, vinegar, a little sugar – mmm. Crisp and refreshing.
When there were too many cukes lying under their vines in the dirt, we picked them all so Mom could make pickles.
Recently, looking up something online, I came across “Ways to use a cucumber.” I knew two – eating them and putting slices of them on baggy eyes.
My eyes have now been opened: Cukes are Essential.
- The first thing I learned was that my cuke-olive salad as an afternoon snack was just the ticket for the perfect pick-me-up that did not involve caffeine, potato chips or cookies.
- The astounding thing I learned was that I could cook cukes. This seems wrong, but the recipes sounded delicious – baked, sauteed, souped (not cold cuke soup, but cooked cuke soup). I was informed that I could use a cuke like a zucchini, but I found no recipe for cucumber bread. Might be worth a try, however.
- Don’t buy product to keep your bathroom mirror from fogging up while you shower; rub a slice of cucumber on the mirror before you shower — no fog and a nice lingering scent will greet you when you emerge.
- To deter grubs and slugs in your yard and garden, place sliced cukes in a disposable pie pan, and the pests will crawl the other way – something in the combination of aluminum and cucumber sends these fellas to the neighbors’ and no noxious poisons polluting the planet.
- This next cucumber hint is a seeing-to-believe idea, and I haven’t tested it, but read on; this one should thrill you. Rub slices of cucumber on your cellulite legs before venturing to the beach in your swimsuit – the phytochemicals in the cuke cause the collagen in your skin to tighten! This is probably why putting cuke slices on one’s eyes has long been effective – we just didn’t know the science of it. Works on wrinkles, too, so they say. I’m willing to try it for that, since nothing else has worked.
- If you’ve imbibed too much and dread the hangover you know you’ll have in the morning, eat cucumbers before bed. Apparently, you wake up not just headache-free but refreshed. This, too, is from the research scientists’ knowledge — vitamin B, sugar, electrolytes in a cuke keep your abused brain pan in equilibrium
- I don’t know who polishes shoes anymore, but if it’s you, try a cuke rather than shoe polish. It cleans, shines and repels water.
- Got a squeaky hinge? No more drippy, oily WD-40 for you, use the long, peeled, pale green veggie fix.
- To get rid of the gunk that hardens around your taps and sinks, use a cuke. Also use it to polish your flatware – no more black fingernails from that gray stuff out of a jar when you’re polishing your Christmas silverware.
- Use an unpeeled cuke to get rid of crayon marks on walls (days of old, I scrubbed my kid’s wall art so hard that the paint disappeared along with the Crayola picture); or grab a handy cuke to erase a pen mistake on a note card.
- The most delightful hint – when you realize you have bad breath and no breath mint and you’re either going to be close-talking or kissing someone, reach into your purse or pocket for your handy cuke, bite off a bit and hold it to the roof of your mouth for 30 seconds to kill the bacteria that causes halitosis.
Okay, I’m done. There may be even more uses for the mild vegetable that can be salad, pickle or stain remover, and I hope you find them. In the meantime, keep those cukes handy.
